As I was driving to work yesterday, the disc jockey was talking about a recent scientific study that was done by a psychologist (at least I think he said that it was a psychologist). The study determined that the average person had 1200 words per minute going through his head. I can believe this, since my head is often filled with songs, to-do lists, comments on things that are going on around me, and the Great American Novel that I am sure that I will write some day. (I did spend some time wondering how he actually counted the words per minute - did each subject have to repeat everything that his brain was saying or could they tape them with some kind of CT scan?) This would have just been another interesting bit of trivia if it weren't for one detail that I found very upsetting. It turns out that out of those 1200 words, 1100 of them are negative.
Ninety two per cent of a person's thoughts each minute are negative? I am a generally happy person, and although I occasionally have an unhappy or negative thought I cannot conceive of being so negative most of the time. Is life so difficult? Are so many things going wrong? Is there no hope?
Unfortunately, I think that in many cases negativity is something that has been learned. No one gives lessons in being negative, but it is something that is picked up as we grow. When Rodgers and Hammerstein wrote the score for "South Pacific", they included a song called "They've Got to be Taught." The plot involved a Navy Ensign and a Navy Nurse who were romantically involved with South Pacific natives, but found that they could not act on that attraction because of racial prejudices. They sang about children learning to hate and fear others from their families.
Do we learn negative thoughts from others? I cannot believe that children are born to be negative thinkers. They are busy, inquisitive, emotional, friendly, frightened, hungry, loving, anxious... Children can be many things, and each one has a different personality. There are definately negative moments when a child is afraid, angry, mad, or frustrated, but there are many happy moments also. How does a child learn to be negative? Is it when he hears his adults speaking negatively about others? Is it when he cannot measure up to his adult's expectations? Is it when his adults are ignoring his accomplishments? Is it when his adults are ignoring his questions or treating him like he is stupid? Is it when he is so pampered that he cannot do anything for himself? Is it when he is the target of jokes and comments? I can still remember several times when I was young and an adult made fun of my weight or something that I had done. These adults were relatives and friends of my parents, and I know that they were nice people. Still, my only memories of them are the times that they made fun of me to get a laugh from other adults. What a sad legacy!
The Bible tells us to "raise up a child in the way that he should go and he will follow it all of the days of his life". Children are so precious, and so fragile. Please, please make sure that the children in your life are treated positively so that they may have positive, productive lives. As adults we have so much power to influence the children that we meet - make sure that you are a positive influence.
